Sunday, September 21, 2008

lost.

"you're not what I thought you're."

whoa. Surprise. *gasps -.-

as our date dwindles greatly in number, (i'm still thankful for its quality, especially
the one recently) we're simply too caught up with our own daily circles of people and routine.

falling short from expectation, i'm not as strong as what you made out of me. not as level-headed, not as intelligent, not as stable, not as XX (insert the age of my mentality which you've calculated, so inaccurately), but you told me you still believe i'm the most clever sensible and rational girl friend you've as compared to peers our age.

i can't believe you being so delusional.

sod it.

your disappointment does not bother me, and that's exactly what bugs me a lot. my nonchalance. your disappointment, 'your' being a collective noun, is not just zong's voice alone. too many "you've not been.. quite yourself", "i don't recognise... you" and whatnot merely became belated concerns being played incessantly on repeat mode.

maybe, right from the start, you've judged me myopically. maybe, the image of that girl who refuses to being reliant, auto-transferred (BIF, damn marketing! -_-#) onto the other stages of her life, causing the impression of ever steely strong. maybe, you're right, no matter what, duckling will be alright.

or maybe, it's high time i get help; time for me to surrender the brave front i've been putting up. i'm none the wiser after.. us. i'm lost.

1 comment:

SoPPy~! said...

Thanks for visiting. I echo the exact same sentiments the way I see it was a power struggle and unfortunate turn of events.

I'm also glad that things have changed, two way communication now is so much more widely accepted and the dictator-ship style of management is going down. =)